in it, pete had died, but he was found to be alive after all (how days of our lives/passions-esque, eh? it’s definitely something james reilly would write…pete probably planned on me having this dream; he loved that marlena-possessing bastard.). however, he had only a week to spend on earth before he would have to leave it. either way, we still were allowed to give our proper goodbyes and hang out with him one last time.

i remember asking him questions i’ve always had: what’s heaven like? did it hurt to die? and he said he didn’t remember dying. he felt like he’d been asleep for a long time. then he added that his dad “wouldn’t wake up,” and he got teary-eyed. i don’t know what that means, because to my knowledge, you don’t die again in heaven. he didn’t seem to want to talk about the afterlife, so i avoided those questions and decided we should enjoy our time left together.

so we rode around. we sang, we joked, we laughed, we cried. it was just like all the other times pete and i had during the length of our friendship– it was so happy. we went to see nicole, and nicole didn’t know he’d come back to life, so he called her on my cell phone and told her he was coming over, and to our disappointment, she wasn’t scared shitless like we figured she’d be, she was surprised and welcoming and happy, like she knew all along that he was bound to come back sometime or another.

i remember telling him how much i love him and how i missed him while he was gone. i can’t remember if i told him or not of the great impact he had on my life just by being my friend, but i hope he knows today.

i miss his laugh. i miss his jokes. i miss his voice. i miss his singing. i miss his wit. i miss his intelligence. i miss his hugs. i miss his sweaty little hands. =( i think i’m going to cry.

pete died 3 weeks ago today. it still doesn’t seem real.