so here it is, the 4th of july, and a lot of people i know are spending this weekend at the beach. where am i? in douglas, but it’s okay, because beka came along and my sister and nieces are down south, as well. i really would like to take a beach trip in the near future, though, but money is once again an issue. i have about $88 to last me until the end of the month, and that’s not a whole lot, especially considering the fact that i haven’t even bought groceries yet! ugh. i just need to play the lottery or something (yeah, i know, spend money to win money…illogical, right?) to get some quick cash. i’m trying to sell that necklace on ebay, but i’m getting no bids. pawn shops won’t take it because it’s silver. what the crap is wrong with silver?! i need money to buy necessary stuff, y’know, like an ipod touch, a Sony Vaio notebook, a trip to the beach… =P all the things your everyday college kid needs to thrive in the wild. =P i kid, i kid, but those things certainly would be nice to have.

oh, in other news, on tuesday morning, justin gets to meet barack obama. justin, you suck. i’m going to kill your plants.

on thursday night, i had a pete dream. in it, he was taller than me, which was really strange. it was a good dream, though, but always the same kind of dream where in it, i know he’s gone and i’m confused as to how he got here, but i accept it and enjoy it anyway. the same kind of thing happened last night where, in my dream, my uncle suddenly died and everyone else knew but my family. this dream really bothers me because i hate any dreams that involve death occurring, and i always feel the need to tell someone about the dream so it won’t happen…? maybe that’s just superstition on my behalf, i guess…? anyway. also in my dream, bart came over to my grandma’s house to console us. like my pete dream, i knew bart was gone and i was confused again. he was the healthier bart (before he got sick), and he wrapped me in his arms and said, “hey, girl,” in his big voice. it was the best feeling. i just cried and cried because i did not want to let him go.

why do i keep dreaming about special people who have passed away? man, it’s just weird.

anyone who knows me knows just how wild i am about david sedaris. he is my favorite writer, and “me talk pretty one day” is my all-time favorite book. it left me laughing so hard, i was in tears. his other essay collections are just as great. i found out yesterday that he has a new book out called “when you are engulfed in flames.” i read the synopsis and was dying to buy it, but figured i’d just put it on hold at the library instead to save money. but now i read the publisher’s description listed in PINES and man, oh man, i might just have to go ahead and buy it. i can’t wait!!!

from the publisher:

Once again, David Sedaris brings together a collection of essays so uproariously funny and profoundly moving that his legions of fans will fall for him once more. He tests the limits of love when Hugh lances a boil from his backside, and pushes the boundaries of laziness when, finding the water shut off in his house in Normandy, he looks to the water in a vase of fresh cut flowers to fill the coffee machine. From armoring the windows with LP covers to protect the house from neurotic songbirds to the awkwardness of having a lozenge fall from your mouth into the lap of a sleeping fellow passenger on a plane, David Sedaris uses life’s most bizarre moments to reach new heights in understanding love and fear, family and strangers. Culminating in a brilliantly funny account of his venture to Tokyo in order to quit smoking, David Sedaris’s sixth essay collection will be avidly anticipated.

it’s hard to believe that i’ve been out of school for nearly 2 months now. it hurts my feelings to know that august quickly approaches and i’ll once again be thrown into the daily grind of school, work, school, work. the MLIS program is entirely online, so they require their students to have a decent computer for classwork. fortunately, they don’t require some insanely expensive computer with a lot of ram and some hardcore processor, so i won’t have to go out and get a new laptop. besides books, i’m pretty much prepared for grad school. we’ll see how it goes come august. i hope july drags by.

i love mark’s kitty. she is a lot nicer than carli. hm…i am very hungry right now. i’m spending this weekend with some of the greatest people to have ever entered my life, and that is awesome. i ate at doc chey’s last night, and that was pretty much heaven. it was also very fattening, no doubt…i need to look into some diet pills, man. i also went to the gay bar last night, and it was way too crowded, so i did not enjoy myself as much. it was nice to be surrounded by hundreds of gay men, though…as anyone who knows me can confirm, that’s pretty much my comfort zone. there was also a drag show going on, so i enjoyed what i could witness of that. i just couldn’t breathe in that place. this one bouncer bitched at me and brandon for blocking the stairs outside when we sat down on them, which made no sense since they were letting in well over what was limited by the fire code, so it didn’t really matter if the stairs were blocked or not. but anyway. i have no idea what mark and i will get into today. there is no telling. i do want to see bethnay, though.

justin, why is google analytics crapping out on me? i’ve totally had more than 0 visitors since june 11!

so i’m going to atlanta this weekend, and i’m pretty excited about that. i’ve told my atlantian friends not to take me shopping, though. i go crazy in atlantic station…i mean, i come home with all sorts of random stuff i don’t need, like extra lighting for my apartment. i need to take care of my credit card instead of buying ridiculous stuff, so i’m making it a point to NOT shop while i’m there.

last weekend was absolutely crazy, but in an enjoyable way. here’s hoping this weekend will be the same way!

Summertime and the wind is blowing outside
In lower Chelsea and I don’t know
What I’m doing in this city
The sun is always in my eyes
It crashes through the windows
And I’m sleeping on the couch
When I came to visit you
That’s when I knew I could never have you
I knew that before you did
Still I’m the one who’s stupid
And there’s this burning
Like there’s always been
I never been so alone
And I’ve never been so alive
Visions of you on a motorcycle drive by
The cigarette ash flies in your eyes
And you don’t mind, you smile
And say the world doesn’t fit with you
I don’t believe you, you’re so serene
Careening through the universe
Your axis on a tilt, you’re guiltless and free
I hope you take a piece of me with you
And there’s things I’d like to do
That you don’t believe in
I would like to build something
But you never see it happen
And there’s this burning
Like there’s always been
I’ve never been so alone
And I’ve, I’ve never been so alive
And there’s this burning
There is this burning
Where’s the soul I want to know
New York City is evil
The surface is everything but I could never do that
Someone would see through that
And this is our last time
We’ll be friends again
I’ll get over you, you’ll wonder who I am
And there’s this burning
Just like there’s always been
I’ve never been so alone alone
And I’ve, and I’ve never been so alive
So alive
I go home to the coast
It starts to rain I paddle out on the water
Alone
Taste the salt and taste the pain
I’m not thinking of you again
Summer dies and swells rise
The sun goes down in my eyes
See this rolling wave
Darkly coming to take me
Home
And I’ve never been so alone
And I’ve never been so alive

the alarm testing company was at my complex this morning, making sure peoples’ burglar alarms worked properly. i don’t subscribe to the service, so i don’t think they were particularly concerned about mine, but it was nonetheless annoying to have to wake up repeatedly to those awful noises. i decided early on not to subscribe to the service just because i didn’t want to fork over an extra $25 a month, not to mention the fact that they’re not good, ademco quality stuff…the burglar alarms provided by my complex aren’t exactly top of the line. anyway, that being said, thanks a lot for waking me up before my real alarm clock went off, mr. burglar alarm man. uggghhh.

have i seriously had NO visitors since june 11? jeez!

google analytics says i haven’t had any visitors at all. um, wtf?